pants on the ground

I had my annual review at work this week.  I have worked there 9 years!  For some reason my boss decided to forgo the typical conference room atmosphere and take me to Tim Horton's.  When he IM'd me that my first thought is *Why?*  and then in my true worrywart fashion i think *is it because it is a bad review?? and he doesn't think I will freak out on him in a public place?  Cus I will.  Tim Horton's isn't all the public at 2pm anyway*

 Anyway - it turns out - he just wanted coffee.

So as we are pulling away in his car -  we see him.

There is a hoopty car with a trailer pulled in at the back of the parking lot.  The drivers door is open and in it sits an old man.  He is turned sideways and both of his feet are planted on the ground.  Aaaaaand his pants are down around his ankles,  So here I am in a car with my boss and we are driving straight toward an old man sitting in his car with his pants on the ground!  *What is he doing???*

Me: "What is that guy doing?  Wait.  What? Are those his pants?  His pants are down around his ankles! Do you see this?!"

Boss: "Yes they are.  Don't look directly at him."

Me: *thinking..  what? are you my dad? what's gunna happen if i look directly at him? will my retinas burn?*
instead I say "oh ok.  but why are his pants down! oh. i think he has boxers on though.  it's not so bad then"

We pull out of the parking lot and boss says he is gunna call the cops.  I think that's a bit extreme - I mean I am not one of "those" that don't call the cops -(that is for later posts) but not for old man pant-less.  I convince him we should go back and ask if he needs help and then assess if the cops need called.

We drive back - boss rolls down his window "Do you need help?" *in the most irritated voice EVER.  He might as well have threatened "don't fuck up my day old man"    old man: "No, thank you.  I just had some difficulty breathing but I am better now and I have someone with me helping me.  Really, thank you for stopping.  Thank you."

*But why are your pants down??  Does it help you breathe?  Do you breathe through your testicles????

Needless to say I had that song stuck in my head the rest of the day. "Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, why old man do you have your pants on the ground?"

eerily the old man looked amazingly similar to this guy: